Overcoming Your Biggest Dating Worries

Overcoming your biggest dating worries

Lots of things can be intimidating when you’ve not done them for a while, and dating is definitely one of them. Your confidence may have been knocked after a divorce. Maybe you’ve just come out of a relationship and have never online dated before. Maybe you’re scared to try a new dating app.

It’s normal to have a few reservations, after all, that’s how we keep ourselves safe. But sometimes our worries can keep us from having fun. And once you get back into it, dating is fun! So let’s have a look at some of those worries, and how to overcome them.


Catfishing is the act of pretending to be someone you’re not when online –usually by using someone else’s photos. There are a few ways to be sure you’re not being catfished, but with Lumen we’ve got you covered. We verify the photos of every single user with a live selfie, so you know that the photos you’re seeing in a profile belong to the person you’re talking to.

In this day and age, it’s perfectly acceptable to check someone out online. We always do a couple of Google searches before going on a date – checking out LinkedIn or other social media to make sure it backs up things our dates have told us before we meet.                           We recommend keeping all conversations on the dating app or website where you first met, until you really know someone. That way you can easily block or report them, and it stops you having to share personal information like your phone number with them until you want to. Always let someone know when and where you’re going on a date, and make sure you check out our first date safety tips if it’s been a while since you met a stranger for a date.

Feeling Insecure?

Here’s the secret to conquering insecurity – everyone feels insecure in some way. Whether it’s about the way you look, your level of success or even any 'emotional baggage' you may have, insecurities are perfectly normal. We’ve all got our issues, but that’s part of who we are and nothing to be worried about. Remember –you’re an amazing person, you’ve come this far, you’re independent and you’ve built up a life to be proud of. You’ve had a lifetime of unique experiences to you, you’re incredibly interesting! You’re a fully rounded and amazing person! And everyone gets first date nerves, so give yourself, and your date, a bit of time to warm up!

Starting Over?

It can feel a bit intimidating starting all over again with a new person, especially if you’re coming out of a long-term relationship. Sometimes it’s easy to feel comfortable in the memory of what you used to enjoy. That doesn’t have to be a bad thing. You’ve had relationships before so you remember how it was to start out – everything felt a bit new, different and weird. But it was also exciting and fun, getting to know someone and realising those feelings of fondness for them.

Just because you’ve fallen for someone before, doesn’t mean you can’t fall for someone completely different! Remember, dating should be enjoyable. Yes it can be nerve-wracking, but in the end it’s all about you and another person making a connection and enjoying each other. So try not to worry too much, and just have fun!

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