Are You Ready For Love?
What story of yourself are you hanging on to and taking seriously? It’s going to be the story that keeps you playing small in life, I guarantee that! For me it used to be that I didn’t feel good enough, or somehow worthy enough of being loved by someone else. It was the long running story of my life. It wore me out. Other people didn’t see me that way and yet I lived my life from that place of ‘not good enough’.
What’s your story at the moment? Is it uplifting or bringing you down?
Until we make peace with the old story and see ourselves as simply ordinary human beings just like the next ordinary human being next to us on the train, the desk, the lunch queue, then we’re going to be standing in the way of love finding us. You know we don’t even need to be extraordinary people who are able to stand in front of the mirror and tell their reflection how gorgeous and lovable they are! Ordinary will do.
There are just two things in life that people experience, love and fear (and all sorts of variations of those two feelings). The more love we experience in our life the easier the ride of life becomes. We’ll begin to see love everywhere.
I guess it begins with that old chestnut, gratitude. Or perhaps it’s acceptance which is a better word. It’s certainly being in a place of not wishing life were different, that’s for sure. You see if we’ve got an internal soundtrack of future based thinking or past based thinking then we’re really missing the point. And it’s easily done, so don’t go beating yourself up about it.
The more time you can spend in the present moment, appreciating the things around you, the more at peace and settled you will be. For example, you woke up this morning, in a bed, with running water in the shower, and probably high speed internet, that’s a pretty good start! Sure, we can think back to all the times life was tough or worry ahead to being unhappily on our own in our old age...however, you really don’t have to think that. In this moment, I’m betting you have all you need.
Once we drop the old stories that no longer serve us moving forward in life, the quicker we can know for certain that we are ready for love.
When we see for certain that we have all we need within ourselves, the easier it will be to allow in the love of someone else. Do not go looking for love if you feel you ‘need’ someone. That is not love, it is co-dependency and is the cause of much suffering in relationships.
We are ready for a new relationship when we don’t ‘need’ it. We are ready for a new relationship when we aren’t looking for someone to ‘complete us’. We are ready for a new relationship when we are happy in our own skin and have no expectations of another. That kind of readiness is freedom and the most likely path to finding a loving relationship.